Why Do Dogs Eat Poop? (And other deep questions)
Taking Lilly out for her morning walk in the park, I had to ask myself this question again. She’s getting better, though. She used to escape from the house every chance she got. She’d run down the street to a field and find some nice, fresh horse manure to roll in.
Now she just eats it. And other poop she finds on the ground. Granted, her brain is the size of a walnut, but seriously? My brain, which is considerably bigger, will never understand it. Yes, yes, I know the argument. There must be some nutritional value in it or an instinct-driven animal wouldn’t eat it.
By that logic, Girl 3 wouldn’t eat her boogers, yet here we are.
I had the same feeling of stupefication when I went to check on Boy 5 in the bathtub tonight.
Why do kids drink their own bath water?
I swear we’ve had this conversation with each of them. “Don’t drink your bath water. It’s full of dirt and germs.” (I can’t even believe that needs saying.) The next time, it’s “DON’T drink your bath water.” That devolves into “GROSS! DON’T DRINK YOUR BATH WATER HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TELL YOU!” And the next time we see it, Her Hotness and I just look at each other and shake our heads. Maybe all that exposure will boost their immune systems.
Oh, and in case you’re wondering, they do eventually grow out of the urge to drink that sludge. It evolves into another urge: peeing in the shower. It makes perfect sense, really. You have a drain right there, and lots of soapy water to rinse it down with. Why take time to stop at the toilet after your shower when you could kill two birds with one stone and all? Maybe this is a boy thing. Girl 16, what say you? How is your shower drain smelling these days?
How is it Girl 3 needs to go potty EVERY time we sit down to eat?
I now believe she does it on purpose and just for spite. There’s no other explanation. At home, at a restaurant, or a picnic in the park, as soon as we’re ready to relax with a meal, she’s ready to prevent it.
She always has to announce it, too. She can’t just toddle off and do her business. Oh, no. It’s a full-fledged production. Sometimes she says, “I’m gonna pee!” with all the urgency of a sudden realization. Her bladder doesn’t fill slowly like the rest of ours do, apparently. It sits there flacid and empty until the family sits down to dinner and then, PKWOOOSH! her body dumps pitchers full in and she has to GO RIGHT NOW.
But she won’t just go. She announces it and then waits. For what—permission? Encouragement? Sympathy, maybe? We acknowledge the emergency. “You know what to do,” we say. And she does.
I’m sure there are others. I’ll add to this list as I think of them.
March 20th, 2009 at 11:18 pm
I have just spent the last 3 nights reading through your archives up to this moment. Needless to say I am enjoying seeing parenting from a male perspective. Makes me understand why my husband does what he does in regards to parenting too.
I do have two points of interest that might help.
But complimenting your blog isn’t the point of this comment
First is Girl 3’s bladder timing. Quick biology lesson, please bare with me I know I can blabber on.
Eating and toileting are closely intertwined when we are babies. A babies brain doesn’t know it’s suppose to loosen pelvic floor muscles or open bowels and therefore the body itself relies on triggers that results in fantastic explosive baby poo and urine that can squirt 3 meters (6ft) across the room. That trigger simply being the act of eating. This trigger fades as we get older and our brains learn to recognize the signals that our bladders is full and that our colons need emptying. Our brains finally grasp the whole toilet thing by the age of 7 on average. So right now at the age of 3, your little girl’s developing brain hasn’t quite sorted out what that full bladder signal is but the moment she sits down to eat, her body starts the emptying process and her brain thinks “oh no the urine is halfway down the urine tract QUICK GOTTA GET TO THE TOILET!”
As adults our bodies are also capable of using muscles to hold on until the bladder is really full which is why we don’t feel the need to go at the beginning of dinner time.
“Phew” I told you I can blabber on.
Reading about Boy13’s troubles really hit a nerve. A very familiar nerve. And I’m not surprised that he’s now been labeled ADD. Both my husband and I are ADD. I’m watching my little Miss 16Months and hoping it skips a generation but it doesn’t seem like it will. Oh well.
Boy13 will find puberty tough. Our ADD brains are working so quick that we don’t have time to think about the consequences of our actions or what even our own emotions will be because of what we do. Mix that with puberty hormones. I’m not sure what choice you and your wife will make about how to help Boy13 but I know you guys will do well. Also take heart that the older we get, the better we learn to manage ourselves. I can’t say I know of any adult ADD sufferer that is even taking medication for it now.
Your boy is a good kid, and you are a good Father. You judge yourself too harshly and wrongly judge yourself by the results you achieve. A person is not defined by the results they achieve but by what steps they took to try to achieve.
Enjoy your daughter’s toilet humour and good luck with your boy.
Kasha
March 22nd, 2009 at 4:17 pm
Maybe Girl 3 is asking to be excused from the table? That’s quite polite of her… except maybe she needs to re-phrase it?
I should tell my hubby to stop threatening our girl when she drinks the bath water…
March 22nd, 2009 at 5:12 pm
Thanks for reading, Kasha. How interesting to know that there is a biological explanation for the little girl’s bladder behavior. I was beginning to think she just didn’t want any of us to have a peaceful dinner. Like, ever.
You said, ” You judge yourself too harshly and wrongly judge yourself by the results you achieve. A person is not defined by the results they achieve but by what steps they took to try to achieve.” I appreciate the encouragement, but that’s not the world I live in. Judged by best intentions and good actions? That’s how we judge ourselves, perhaps, but results are what bring the bonuses. (Unless you work in high finance, apparently.) Not to worry, though. I don’t take my judgments of myself too seriously.
Julia, that’s an optimistic thought. Except that she’s asking before she eats a bite, which is problematic.
March 27th, 2009 at 8:10 pm
Is it too girly for a guy to say “ew!”? Cause I’m saying it…
I think the bladder thing is simply a matter of making room for what is going to go in next. My youngest does the same thing at dinner time but it’s #2s he has to go do…
May 18th, 2009 at 12:24 pm
I think I just lost my appetite….you sound like my daughter’s friend who loves “toilet” jokes…